Wednesday, September 2, 2009
Wanted: Baby Friends
So, I don't know how many people have experienced this or not but trying to find people to hang out with babies is hard. I was telling my husband the other day it's like dating. You meet new people, hang out, and see if you get along. It's really sort of funny. I have used things like moms like me, which is online and also joined a moms group. I just sometimes feel that I don't really fit in with the women I have met. I guess I just have high expectations in meeting people with babies. I just really need to get out of the house sometimes and have been trying to find people I click with to hang out with. I just haven't really found many people that I can relate to. I tend to hold on to the fact that I still have best friends from middle/high school but they don't live around here. I keep thinking I will eventually find friendships like that again, but I think it's rare that I have experienced that in the first place. I don't know how many people can relate to this but this is something I've just been thinking about lately.
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I'm right there with you. I'm in a huge funk about it too. I hate that I can't find moms that I can hang out with. It seems like the ones I meet online are a million miles away! We all just need to move closer together.
ReplyDeleteGood luck! Alyssa is 16 and I never did find those people I clicked with...LOL..That's encouraging huh? I just didn't fit in because I didn't follow "the standard" or "what the books said" and I did my own thing that I thought was right for me and her. That ruffled bunches of feathers, but what the heck! She's mine anyway! LOL Don't try so hard and you might actually run into more that way. Maybe you could join a mommy and me exercise group, church group, or play date group. They all seem popular these days.
ReplyDeleteOMG!!! Where are you ladies located? cause I'm on the same boat - always hanging out in parks with the baby by myself... I've been joining some online groups and have been finding some new friends... hope they last :)
ReplyDeleteThis is definitely a topic that lots of moms grapple with (and even nannies!). It's actually why I started blogging and was so happy to find so many great moms online.
ReplyDeleteIt's almost the same as when you are trying to meet men -- hang out where moms hang out -- the playground, play groups, gymboree, the library storytimes, etc. Sometimes it is doubly hard because there are four personalities involved and sometimes the babies aren't too fond of each other or their schedules are opposite.
Do you have a Parents as Teachers program in your area? I used to work for one and we held free weekly playgroups. Have you tried meetup.com? Good luck on your search!
This is definitely what I struggled with the first time around. I was young and all my friends were away at college or living their single lives. I had a few close friends but they were working during the day and were childless. I tried one mommy group and although they were very nice, I just didn't fit in. I tried another and it was better but my daughter napped 2x a day and it was hard to get out to their outings. I took a Gymboree class and ended up meeting a mom that went to my highschool. We clicked and I found a friend but my daughter was 1 yr already. Then we moved, far from family and friends. I joined the Moms Club here and met some great woman. I clicked some people and basically did things with them. My neighbor though is my best friend. She is 10 yrs older then me but we have the best time. She is a SAHM mom and to her I owe my sanity. She has twins that are just a little older then my oldest. So I say don't give up, keep looking. Look for local moms clubs that do things once a week or so. Take a mommy and me class. Also once my daughter went to preschool, I met some friends that way. I mean at that age playdates are for moms too. I have been lucky that my daughters friends moms are great and we do things without our kids too. Hang in there!
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